Alex is “Cool”
Thanks to Bev for alerting me to this story about the emotional abuse of a 5 year old by his kindergarten teacher, Wendy Portillo. Portillo thought it would be a good idea to stand young Alex Barton, who has Asperger’s Syndrome, in front of the class and invite other pupils to say what they did not like about him. Then she conducted a vote on whether he should remain in the class. The pupils voted 14 to 2 to exclude him. He spent the rest of the day in the nurse’s office and has not returned to the school. He screams whenever he accompanies his mother to drop off his sibling at the school. The police have investigated and the district attorney has decided not to prosecute. The school district is still investigating the matter.
Bullying of children with disabilities is commonplace. But I was shocked to read that a teacher was leading the bullying when I read Amanda’s blog about Alex, which suggested that bullying by adults or the sanctioning of bullying by adults who should be defending vulnerable children is a regular occurrence. Amanda also provides a valuable perspective on a culture that not only rewards the “winners” but also sets out to deliberately punish the “losers” as well.
Statements by public figures suggest that we aspire to an inclusive society that embraces diversity. The reality is somewhat different. Amanda asks a very pertinent question.
I also want to know what on earth it means that it’s considered “good social skills” to learn to be one of the people that excludes. And autistic and non-autistic people alike can eventually learn to be that, even if we weren’t much like that to begin with. I’m not trying to say we can’t, I’m not going to pretend not to notice what happens to autistic people who gain the power to become exclusive. But it’s sheer ugliness that these horrible things are treated as normal, and being the target of them makes you seen as somehow worse than the people doing the targeting. And the people doing the targeting are seen as the ones to emulate, it seems like.
I think we owe it to Alex to let the school authorities in Port St Lucie know that this teacher’s behaviour is beyond the pale. There is another way. I am emailing this story, originally posted by Fargo on alt.support.autism to the school principal, Maria Cully with copies to Wendy Portillo and the St Lucie County School Board.
SOMETHING SPECIAL ABOUT BENJI
Once upon a time there was a Benji. He looked like a little boy. He had
brown hair and big brown eyes and a very sweet smile. But Benji wasn’t like
other little boys. Sometimes Benji was very quiet and the other children at school didn’t
think that Benji knew how to play.Sometimes Benji was very noisy and the other children didn’t think that
Benji knew how to be serious.And sometimes…sometimes Benji was very angry.
There was something very different about Benji.
But all the time, inside, Benji wanted to be like the other children.
He liked to watch them run on the playground. Sometimes they told him not
to stare.He liked to watch them go down the slide but he didn’t like to go down the
slide himself and they thought he was a sissy.He liked to play characters in movies and sometimes the kids said he was a
crazy guy.Yes, there was something very different about Benji.
Then one day, the teacher told the classroom what it was that was different.
Benji was Autistic.
Benji could hear and could see and could feel things. But sometimes he
didn’t know what was said. Sometimes he didn’t know what to do. Sometimes
there were things he didn’t like to touch or to taste.The teacher explained that while Benji was just like all the other kids on
the inside, sometimes things he heard or saw or touched or tasted got
confused before they reached his brain.And this could make him very angry because, Benji was waiting and wanting to
be friends.She told the children that each of them was different from the rest of the
class, just like Benji.Mary was the tallest girl and Angie was the shortest.
Billy had the most freckles, and Charlie had the longest hair.
She told the class that being different wasn’t a bad thing because being
tall or short or having freckles or having long hair wasn’t a bad thing.
Sometimes it was very special.She continued to go around the classroom telling each child something
special about them.Toby told the funniest jokes and Max was the best speller.
Tammy could run the fastest and Richard drew the best airplanes.
Each child was different yet each child was special.
The teacher asked the children to try to help Benji learn how to do the
things the other kids knew how to do. And she asked for them to each find
out the answer to this question.How is Benji special?
The kids decided to try to help Benji.
When Benji was quiet they would talk to him by saying “It is a nice day”
instead of asking him what kind of day it was.When he was loud they would say, “Benji, we have to be quiet now. We will
be loud at recess.”When he watched them run on the playground they would go over to Benji and
say, “Benji, will you run with me?”And when he was afraid to go down the slide, they did not call him sissy.
They told him things they were afraid to do.They played like they were characters in movies, too, and Benji joined in on
their games.But most of all, they stopped calling Benji a crazy guy. Because once they
got to know him…they found out what was special about Benji.Benji was “Cool.”
Alex is cool as well. I hope someone can tell him that.
Comment by Amanda | May 24th, 2008
People could take “they decided to help Benji” in the wrong way — so here’s a link that talks about some of the more problematic ways of taking that. A quote from the article: People with disabilities tell us that it is easier to be ignored than to be patronized or seen as a “class project.”
Pingback by Whitterer on Autism » Blog Archive » Alex Barton | May 24th, 2008
[...] “Action for Autism.” [...]
Pingback by Along the Spectrum » My Two New Heroes | May 24th, 2008
[...] Stanton quotes a touching piece of writing in his blog post on this story. In encourage you to click over and read it. It describes how things should have gone in Ms. [...]
Comment by Shawn | May 24th, 2008
Touching story about Benji. It’s they kind of lesson that should have been taught in Alex’s class. And at the age of 5, the kids would have absorbed it and been much more accepting. I suspect they had already been taught, by the teacher, how they should treat Alex.
Comment by melissa | May 25th, 2008
thank you he will be told.
Comment by Kristina | May 25th, 2008
This is very tangentially related but I had to laugh about “Charlie had the longest hair”—my Charlie has a buzz cut, perfect for his beloved swimming.
Comment by Suzanne | May 25th, 2008
If your laws do not cover this as emotional abuse of a child, then perhaps your laws on discrimination on the basis of disability might.
The woman used children as a weapon to abuse another child. All of the children will remember this, but the learning will not be positive. It is no better than a parent standing on the sidelines of a sporting activity and screaming at their child to attack another … such aggressive cruelty has nothing to do with ‘tallying’.
She has a duty of care. Her behaviour was unconscionable.
Please do not let her do it again.
Pingback by The Golden Rule « Odd One Out | May 25th, 2008
[...] http://leftbrainrightbrain.co.uk/?p=834 http://actionforautism.co.uk/2008/05/24/alex-is-cool/ http://aspergersquare8.blogspot.com/2008/05/not-special-support-alex-barton.html [...]
Comment by Mike | May 25th, 2008
Christschool has done a masterful job of compiling draft letters of complaint to the authorities and the media over at Thinking in Metaphors. Anyone who wants to use them please let Christschool know and also forward copies to ASAN who are trying to coordinate responses.
Comment by RAJ | May 26th, 2008
The permissive public schools in the US are incapable of preventing ‘bullying’. My daughter (PDD/NOS) was not going to a public school under any circumstances. I would agree with Einstein who considered all religion to be ‘childish superstition’ yet my wife and I enrolled our daughter in a Catholic parochial school because of the strictness the nuns used and an absolute ban on any ‘bullying’ behavior. Best educational decision my wife and I ever made.
Comment by thewildeman2 | May 27th, 2008
I have done a video in Alex’s honor and will post it soon. I too speak out on autism and I am an abuse/bullying survivor. You can find me on youtube under thewildeman2. Please look me up. I hope Alex knows, that he really is very special and I hope that the pain will fade for him soon. What they did was deplorable. I applaud you in this post and I’m glad I found it. As an advocate, I offer myself as a listening ear to anyone who is suffering their rights over autism or any mental “impairment”. I have aspergers. Good day.
Comment by spike of sapphoq.com | May 28th, 2008
I am outraged.
The teacher surely had other options for dealing with a five year old.
My heart goes out to Alex and to everyone who has had to endure abuse for being different or possessing atypical neurology.
spike
Comment by Joyce Clark | May 29th, 2008
I would like to submit my vote to fire the teacher and to vote for prosecution. If she can vote a child out of class, we should be able to vote her out of the school system.
Comment by Mary Todd | May 30th, 2008
Whoever wrote this beautiful rendition about Benji needs to be acknowledged! As a mother of a 7 year old little bright boy who is also ASD-HF and a teacher of children with mutliple disabilities. I can feel Alex, Benji, and even Danny’s(my son’s) pain and see this as a step backwards in truly understanding those who are ASD. My son for the first time this year actually initiated a conversation with another child about his age that did not revolve around his limited interests of time, weather, and Spongebob. He actually ask another kid to play with him. I reward and cheer on those moments and try to forget and ignore the time when he once again couldn’t ask for a peer to play with him. All kids have feeling even those who “seem” to be in their own little world of autism. They long to be asked to parties and playdates and have fun but just don’t know how to ask or join without being asked. This teacher should resign quietly and NEVER teach another child for the rest of his/her life, please do us all a favor. There are more than enough potenial teachers in this world who will bring the understanding to the world that refuses to try to understand the different child.
Comment by Jan | June 1st, 2008
As the mother of a 13 year old daughter with moderate autism, I have observed many different types of childhood behavior toward my socially challenged child. I have observed cruel and incredibly kind behavior from teachers and other adults. I have never seen a worse model for impressionable 5 year olds in all of my years. I keep remembering the oath of “At least do no harm”. She totally doesn’t get it and I don’t think that being a teacher is the right of everyone who gets a teaching degree. If I thought a teacher who had no better values were teaching either of my children, I would lobby to have them fired. She would never get away with treating any other class of child that way (be it over race, gender, religion, etc.).
Comment by Jake Joehl | June 3rd, 2008
I think that what Alex’s teacher did–and what she perpetrated–was totally uncalled for, not to mention very cruel and I hope she gets fired. As someone with a visual impairment I’ve experienced a little bit of bullying, but never to this extent. Melissa and Alex, I think you should be compensated for what happened.
Comment by Thomas D. Taylor | July 6th, 2008
Midnight In Chicago puts out free audio podcasts. One of these is called “Autism and Bullying: Part I & Part II.” Go to http://www.mic.mypodcast.com to hear them.
Comment by Alex Chan | July 14th, 2008
Hi Mr. Stanton, my name is Alex Chan and I have been working with autistic children for almost a year now. Since decided to write my own blog, I have came across your website. What a story and great source of information you have here! The story inspired me, and what you wrote about the feelings of autistic kids was really true! I might be not be a person who can truly understand what autism is, but at the very least, I acknowledge their feelings, and often try my best to understand them.